Commandment Number Five - Honor your folks
"Honour your father and your mother, as the Lord your God commanded you, so that your days may be long and that it may go well with you in the land that the Lord your God is giving you." Honor your ma and pa. What kind of shit is that. First of all, this is a blatant attempt to enforce a strict seniority system. Many traditional systems were heavily weighted towards age, and against such evils as innovation and the division of rewards (booty, bootie, bootee) based on merit. Second, I have a kid and this whole honor thing sure just isn't natural. It surely doesn't present itself in the first sixteen months. Maybe it emerges in the twenties, like schizophrenia. Maybe it has to be imposed by my co-honoree. As I type this my honorer is proving my point by beginning to evince displeasure at being in her crib 'napping.' She has 'napped' for a few hours, but only napped for about thirty minutes. It's 3:44. So, life sucks. My honorer first decided that four hours of nap was too much to bestow on her honoree. Than consistency was too much to give away. Now, consistency is back but the nap itself has nearly vanished. Third, how exactly would you enforce this? If you have any ideas, let me know. I'll read them later, maybe ... for now, honor and duty call.